Tuesday, August 26, 2014


wellllllllllll because i have SO many followers (this is a literal JOKE)
i have absolutely no qualms telling the 3 of you about my day.

if i had to choose my top 3 worst days ever
today would be in the running.

well i mean, it started off great. i read some, then had lunch/watched divergent with David. but then i had to leave because soccer and oh my liiiiiterally. (#whitegirlmoment) i had to go to the trainor to get my hip wrapped because i hurt my hip-flexer so i was late to practice by 10 minutes. looooooooooong horrible and excruciating story later i was supposed to run 10 laps. at the end of practice. because of my tardiness. WHAT. i was liiiivid. i could have screamed at my coach. screamed. and i almost did. i have no idea how i remotely kept my cool at all. THANK YOU HOLY SPIRIT. anyway i had that shortened to 5 laps. 

aside from the big soccer fiasco that i didn't even describe
in detail, i had to stop at redbox on the way home from practice to return a movie
but the redbox was broken

then when i got home my mom said that she wanted to see a movie
so we saw "If I Stay" and it was the worst
as if my day wasn't bad enough
saddest movie ever

and to top it all off, when i got my hip wrapped, it gave me a rash, so there's that.
and i have the BIGGEST blister ever on my foot that i got from those laps
so there's that, too. 

but what i forgot to mention was the small little reminder that God so lovingly sent my way
i got a text after soccer from my friend Sharon
Sharon has faithfully sent me a Bible verse
for 3 years

so i'll end with that verse
Ephesians 4:2
"Always be humble and gentle.
Be patient with one another,
making allowances for each other's faults
because of your love."
and today, i needed to hear that.

Thursday, August 21, 2014

a note from a father

My darling, My daughter…

How are you, My beautiful child? I have missed you, I’ve been wondering where you have been. I feel as though I have spent so long watching you, being there for you, just waiting for you to notice Me.

You often feel that in a crowded room; you’re alone.. Don’t you notice me at the back of the room, as you dance about in your world? I’m watching you from a distance, from where you left Me when you pushed Me to the side, hid My word in your backpack,  closed the pages of your journal when someone asked what you were writing; for fear of what others might think of Me, your Father.

I’m still here, sometimes I see you looking for Me, at the end of the day - when everyone else has gone home, and you’re laying in your bed, staring out the window. When you go into the bathroom, wipe off your make-up, and remember who you naturally are… I hear your heart looking for Me. I’m there My beautiful girl; when you stare at your reflection, and you cringe at the way your nose turns slightly out at the bottom, or the way your freckles aline perfectly across your cheeks. When you purse your lips at the colour of your skin, the shape of your hairline, and the way your lips don’t always rest perfectly together. You never seem to like what you see, and I try to reach out to you, and explain why I painted your face that way, why I intricately sketched your lips to fall together the way they do - but you’re too busy for me, it seems you always are these days… Splashing inks of red, creams, browns and blacks across your face; hiding the masterpiece that I created you to be; sometimes I worry you have forgotten who you truly are, My child.

I see you each week, stepping through your routines, meeting your friends, and making time to talk. I know you probably wish I wasn’t My dear, but I find Myself falling jealous to the time you have for everyone but Me. I wonder; do you remember last Sunday, when you promised we would have coffee together, when you said you were sorry for all the times you left me waiting, sitting and hoping you would arrive; I waited with my arms filled to overflowing. I prepared gifts for you each time you said we would meet… I wrapped grace in a parcel, perfectly and sweetly; for all the times you did Me wrong. I folded compassion and love into a neat bundle, with a ribbon of acceptance around it, gently tied with care and concern for you - for all the times you felt unwanted, unloved and alone, the times you felt no one cared… I waited for you, but you did not come; lately dear, you rarely come… 

I fell to My knees for you today, I begged for your company in some kind of way.
I fell to My knees and I called out your name, hoping maybe, you’d do the same. 

But I waited again, I sat waiting for you; in a crowded room, where no body knew; that you had promised Me your time, for a short moment or two. I waited patiently for you, because you are worthy of My time, I consider you much more important than any other creation of Mine. It was then and there, I stood to my feet, and found you somewhere new… From across the room, I noticed you… You had forgotten about Me, My princess - but I hadn’t forgotten about you.

I’ve played hide and seek with you; I promised I would find you, and surely I did. When it came to your turn to come to Me, My dear, I waited for so long - only to find, you lost interest in our time together. I’ve played tag with you; I chased you, and chased you, and chased you again, I’ll never give up chasing you… Not until the very end. But when you chased Me back; that’s what gave Me great joy, to have you reach out your arms to Me; calling My name, telling Me you want Me, you need Me… It was beautiful, but short lived. - I wonder where you have gone My child; don’t you know I miss you?

I know you love encouragement, inspiration and conferences with great speakers; you love the hype of My word, and the gift of My life - but when it comes to the crunch, and you’re the star of the show - I long to be front row and centre, proudly cheering you on. But instead you buy me no ticket, and there I am; waiting for you again, at the back of a crowded room.

My daughter, do you remember when you told me you couldn’t go on? When tears stained your cheeks, and you found it hard to breathe - you sat weeping from a distance, but all of a sudden, you found support? That caring friends hand on your shoulder; the text message from your sister, the facebook message you received; it was not merely a coincidence, it was a small reminder of how lovingly I care for you.

I miss you My daughter, I miss the way you would take time for Me; and keep it
I miss the way you would proudly tell your friends about My faithfulness, and believe it.
I miss you desiring Me, wanting Me, and Hungering for Me; desperately and longingly, wanting more of Me. You have forgotten Me, My Child… 

My heart is breaking for you; please come back to Me?
I’ll be waiting where you left Me, at the back of the crowded room.

Lovingly and longingly, prayerfully and passionately signed;
Your Father, Your Lord, Your King, Your Best Friend, Your Comforter, Your Counsellor. 

Saturday, August 16, 2014

same "love"

Abigail Oestreich
Comp 110
Professor Barber
13 August 2014
Same Love
“Almost any behavior begins to look normal if you are exposed to enough of it."
-Marshall Kirk and Hunter Madsentwo gay activists
     The argument that these two men make is valid. But why would we allow a certain behavior that once was not okay become the norm? There was obviously a reason why it was notaccepted. And so, we reach the age-old topic of debate. Ever since the beginning of time, people have been debating things. One opinion versus another; one is right and the other is wrong. In the past 20 years, America has seen a new debate rise to the top of the list in social and political issues: gay marriage. So what is right and what is wrong? Is gay really okay? Is Westboro Baptist Church right, and does God “hate fags”? While many say that this issue affects only people involved in homosexual relationships, it actually affects the country and society as a whole. Marriage, and all that it entails, was intended to be between one man and one woman. Supporting homosexuality and same-sex attraction (SSA) not only goes against natural law, but also involves redefining marriage. 
     Due to biological factors and many health concerns, marriage should only be between a man and a woman and gay sex is one of the big reasons why. Male to male genital contact is the main way of spreading colon cancer, rectal cancer, and hepatitis. 82 percent of all known AIDS cases reported in 2006 were the cause of male to male contact. Obviously gay men are not the only people who get AIDS, but it is most common among them and easier spread among them. 60 percent of all syphilis cases are reported in homosexual and bisexual men.Lesbians have a higher risk for breast cancer, cervical cancer, and hepatitis C. Because of the diseases and implications of homosexual sex, having homosexual sex can and will shorten lifespan between eight and twenty-two years (Center for Disease Control). Smoking shortens lifespan by seven years, and if we discourage smoking, why do we encourage homosexuality? Gays will argue that it’s an act of love and it’s only between them. Well, in many cases, innocent people have been given these diseases through blood transfusions without participating in the act. As Augustine said, “We love the truth when it enlightens us, but we hate it when it convicts us” this leads to the fact that, “many homosexual activists get angry when you cite these health facts. But why would anyone get angry over facts?” (Turek) Specifically in regards to anal sex, the rectum is a one-way street, meant only to expel poisons. Labeling it as an act of “love” will not change the fact that it’s nothing but harmful. Some argue that, “The only loving couples I know…are gay couples” (Rodriguez), but how can you say that they are being loving when all they are doing is harming their partner and destroying their health?
     The fight for homosexuality is not really about equal rights anymore, it’s about acceptance. All homosexuals want is tolerance and even endorsement for their lifestyles. “The law is a great teacher” (Turek), and if we continue down the path of government supported homosexuality and gay marriage it will only lead to destruction. First things first, if homosexuality was right and was not harmful, there would be no need for debate. Just like it is right to wear your seatbelt or it is known that killing people is wrong, if homosexuality was right it would be the norm. But, obviously since this topic is such a large debate it is not the norm. If homosexual relationships were to be treated the same way that heterosexual relationships are by the government, it would lead to higher insurance costs. Due to the diseases that spread through homosexuals more frequently and more easily, insurance companies would charge more to cover the medical expenses. There would be free speech restrictions – what you are allowed to say would be limited. Speaking against homosexuality would be considered ‘hate speech’ even if it’s just in casual conversation. (Doesn’t this go against the Constitution, and everything America ever stood for?) Some countries, such as Canada and Sweden, already have this in place. Several Canadian Pastors were arrested because they quoted Bible verses to their churches. This would lead to a lack of religious freedom. Because people would no longer be allowed to say what they really think, they would not be allowed to practice the religion they would like to. Honestly, how many religions actually support gay marriage? Very few, if any at all. The only thing people are looking for these days is, “peace, goodness, and jollity” (White) and accepting gay marriage will not change that.
The literal definition of marriage is a union between a man and a woman. So, let’s say marriage is redefined as a union of those that love each other or a “coupling”. What if a man wants to marry two women? Or a woman wants to marry her cat? Or three men want to get married? What about the grown man who wants to sleep with the little boy? That’s love, right? Why are these relationships wrong but two men or two women who want to get married is okay? Bestialitypolygamy, and pedophilia are wrong, but homosexuality is right. This is the mindset of society today, “our culture is willing to tell some people they must suppress their desires” (Weed), but other people are allowed to satisfy their physical needs. If we completely redefine marriage we reinvent the whole culture. Without marriage being and staying between a man and a woman, we lose the aspect of childbearing. Having kids was the original purpose of marriage. Without it, society would cease to exist. And yes, there arenatural couples that cannot have children or do not want children but these are the exception, not the rule. If gay marriage were tosupersede natural marriage, gay couples would take priority in adoption over natural couples. How is it right to take away the opportunity for a couple to adopt a child when they have been trying for years to have their own baby but cannot because of medical reasons? Why should the couple who are supposed to and meant to have children be second to the homosexual couple? An increase in homosexual parents will increase illegitimacy in children. Because the kids won’t actually be theirs, the kids need both a mother and a father. Illegitimate kids are more likely to become rapists, participate in theft and murder, and generally do poorly in school due to a lack of motivation. How many gang members do you know of have a loving mom and dad? Both genders play a part in child raising – mothers and fathers complement each other. In the words of Mayor Bob, from the movie Pleasntville, directed by Gary Ross, “It’s just the wrong way to do it. We need a code of conduct that we can all agree to live by.” All of this being said, there does need to be some form of tolerance. Tolerance meaning acceptance of the person, not their acts. Hatred for what a person believes is persecution in the raw sense of the word. There is no room for bigotry from any party – for or against homosexuality.

Thursday, August 7, 2014

no homo, but...

Homosexuality is a really prevelant issue in society today. There's always debates and political things going on about it. 
As many of you know, I am currently taking a class at Bucks County Community College. For our final exam, we have to write a paper for or against gay marriage and same sex attraction (SSA). My professor and I have been in an ongoing debate throughout the class on whether or not you can argue logically and reasonably using faith and religion. I say you can. There has to be a logical reason you believe what you believe. If you can't argue your beliefs using reason then what you believe isn't reasonable. 
If I can write this paper well and unprejudiced then she won't fail me. But if I come off in any way ignorant or uneducated she's going to fail me. She is the most liberal woman on the entire earth. If you don't believe what she does, then you're automatically wrong. 
Brian Weed gave me 4 books and a pamphlet to use as evidence other than the Bible for this paper. 
1. Is God Anti-Gay?
2. Correct, not Politically Correct
3. The Truth about Same Sex Marriage
4. Love into Light

So far I have only read two, and they have actually been really interesting. I've learned a lot about how people who struggle with SSA think and act. Even if I don't get a good grade on my paper, this has been an eye opening experience already. 
The paper is due next Wednesday, and we are writing it in class. We can come with an introductory paragraph, a typed page of notes, and our textbook. We will have three hours to write it. 
Please be praying for the Lord's hand on this paper and that he will give me the words to say. I want to be a light to my professor and show her what real Christianity is. 

1 Peter 3:15 ESV
"but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect"

"I charge you in the presence of God and of Christ Jesus, who is to judge the living and the dead, and by his appearing and his kingdom: preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths. As for you, always be sober-minded, endure suffering, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry."
(2 Timothy 4:1-5 ESV)

Tuesday, August 5, 2014

instagram challenge.

I have decided for the next thirty days to only post things on instagram about Jesus, Bible verses/encouragement, etc. I'm calling it #30dayswithjesus

If you want to keep an eye out for my posts feel free to visit

Sunday, August 3, 2014

i choose jesus.

"In one moment
Everything changed.
Who I was got washed away,
When mercy found me.
The savior's arms are open wide
And I've found love
For the very first time. 
When mercy found me."

Friday, August 1, 2014

colleeegggeee. merpp.

scary, scary, scaryyy.
I have been dreading this moment for like a year.
buuttt, surprisingly enough
it wasn't that bad.
shocker right?
i know.
I applied to two schools for early admission
Kentucky Christian University (yayyy!!) and Grove City College.
GCC is my 'reach' school. I don't really expect to be accepted but it would be really nice.
Kentucky is my top choice. I reeeeally wanna go there. ugh. I can't believe this is happening!
Senior year is here! I got senior picture information in the mail today.
it's toooo weird. although
i am excited (kinda a little) for school to start
so many new beginnings.
life has been really crazy lately
one bad decision after another.
but i'm learning?
and growing?
and changing?
cool. woo.